Comments on: Love Your “Flaws”

By: Steve Hays

Steve Hays — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 16:30:12 +0000

How true this is! And it doesn’t just apply to one’s flaws. It applies to anything you want to change in your life - anything you need to face in your life. What is love really? It means acting, thinking, doing whatever it takes to bring God to the place, person, situation, self.

We are training to get angry at things we want to change. Talk about obsolete paradigms!

So I love your article! And therefore expect it to have it expand in it’s impact, audience, healing…

Blessings,

-shh

By: Patty

Patty — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 04:36:41 +0000

Hi Mike,

Thanks for the article. I think you are really on to something here. I’ve been working on my “flaws” for most of my adult life (I’m 50) and doing that just doesn’t seem to bring me more happiness. I feel that when I’m loving and accepting myself I feel happier. I’m not saying that I don’t think it is good to work towards growth; I’m just thinking that I want to come from the thought that I love me and I want to be more rather than I’m broken and I must fix me to love me. One way I love my “flaws” (feeling timid for example) is to understand where that comes from and acknowledge that anyone who has been through what I have would feel timid too. I guess I’m saying that I’m trying to have compassion for myself. Thanks for the article and validation of what I’ve been thinking lately. Keep up the great work!

By: Vania Tashjian Frank

Vania Tashjian Frank — Sat, 16 Jan 2010 01:07:26 +0000

It feels so good when something we’ve heard 1000 times finally sinks in more deeply. I recently had a similar insight. When I actually take the time to listen to some uncomfortable, difficult feeling like guilt or anger or unworthiness, I often unearth some unhealed situation from my past.

And when I take the time to explore it, it doesn’t seem so scary or so bad. Especially when I’m feeling inadequate, my instinct is to run. But when I face it head on, it’s easier to see that what I’m feeling is not the truth; it’s just a fleeting emotion that is triggered by my past. Eventually the fog lifts and the love and caring I have for myself trickles back in.

By: Cristina

Cristina — Tue, 12 Jan 2010 19:39:16 +0000

I woke up this morning acknowledging, in a real way, anger as one of my flaws. I’m bipolar about it in a way. I’m almost always pleasant but can go from 0 to 90 in a minute. It is easy to justify my anger-someone did or said something that hurt. I don’t want to feel pain and anger is easier. Did they really do or say anything to hurt me intentionally?Over-sensitivity, another flaw. What if I turn my anger in to action? What if I channel the sensitivity into compassion? What if I simply looked at things from a different angle? What if I simply loved myself, warts and all? Thanks Mike. A timely reading.

By: Paul Puckett

Paul Puckett — Tue, 12 Jan 2010 18:09:56 +0000

Mike, great column and I enjoyed reading it at Intent. One of my self-perceived flaws is my seeming inability to use a calendar and be “organized”. As I tackle that obstacle, maybe the advice in your article provides the best path.

Maybe it isn’t the calendar or the approach, maybe it is accepting that, for me, there is a different approach. Maybe the time I spend trying to conform to a pre-designed organization system is simply a way to procrastinate the organization itself?

Either way, you made me think. Thanks!

By: Doris

Doris — Tue, 12 Jan 2010 17:32:31 +0000

What you’re saying is a reflection of Thomas Moore’s Care of the Soul which I am still reading. I too have tried to be true to myself, but have lost jobs because of it etc. And I never seem to learn from my mistakes, so the only thing I have left is to accept what I am.

Thanks for sharing.

By: Suzy

Suzy — Tue, 12 Jan 2010 16:36:14 +0000

Thanks for sharing - very helpful!

By: Jay Platt

Jay Platt — Tue, 12 Jan 2010 02:21:35 +0000

Excellent article, Mike.

Thanks for your openeness and willingness to share. I too deal with the feelings of being flawed or not good enough, at times.

Thank you for letting me know I’m not alone and for providing some great strategies for dealing with such feelings.