March 17, 2010

In This Issue

Featured Article: The Power of No

Announcements

Daddy's Little Girls

Welcome to this week's issue of Appreciation (and Authenticity) in Action.

Happy St. Patrick's Day! I hope you and those around you are doing well and getting ready for spring to officially begin this weekend. I love spring!

I'm really excited to announce that this is the 100th issue of my email newsletter! I wrote my first issue of "Appreciation in Action" back in November of 2004 and sent it out to a few hundred people (mostly friends and family). Back then it was a "monthly" newsletter (although often quarterly). Now it goes out weekly to about 13,000 people - all over the country and the world.

Thank you so much for being on my list - it means so much to me to be able to write each week and connect with you in this way!

With Appreciation,

P.S.  If you want to check out last week's article, The Art of Allowing, click here.  It was also published on the Huffington Post.

The Power of No

(For this week's audio message, click here.)

How do you feel about saying "no?"  I notice that saying "no" to certain people and in some situations can be challenging for me.  Sometimes I find myself saying "yes" when "no" would really be more authentic.  More covertly, I also find myself at times giving "half-truths" (which is quite an oxymoron if you think about it) to people when they present me with opportunities, engage with me about connecting, etc.  You know what I mean, you run into someone and say, "We should really get together sometime," but you really have very little interest in or commitment to making that happen.  Does this ever happen to you?

What is it about saying "no" that many of us have a hard time with?  For me, it comes down to a few specific things.  First of all, I get scared that people will get upset or disappointed if I say "no."  Second, I'm not a huge fan of hearing "no" from others myself, so being the one saying it can be difficult for me.  And lastly, I consider myself a "yes" type person. I pride myself on being open, willing, and ready to say "yes" at all times.  In other words, "no" often seems like a failure, an admission of weakness, or just an overall negative thing to say.

However, saying "no" is one of the most important aspects of living a life filled with balance, integrity, and authenticity.  Our ability and capacity to say "no" with confidence is one of the most important aspects of creating peace and power in our lives.  This is about creating healthy boundaries, honoring ourselves, and being real - it's not about being closed, cynical, or unwilling.

The majority of people I know, especially these days, live their lives with a feeling of "overwhelm" that either runs them or at least gets in their way from time to time.  If you think of the aspects of your life where you feel most overwhelmed, stressed out, or ineffective - there is probably a theme going on - you haven't said "no" when you needed to.  If you also think about any relationships in your life where these is stress, struggle, or conflict - you saying "no" with honesty and kindness is also probably missing.

When we don't say "no" in an authentic way we end up feeling burdened, stressed out, resentful, and even victimized (although, ironically, we forget that we are the ones who said "yes" in the first place).

Saying "no" does have real consequences.  Sometimes we will upset, disappoint, or annoy people.  We may also have a significant amount of fear about saying "no" to certain people (our spouse, boss, co-worker, friend, child, etc.) or in certain situations (at work, with clients, with our in-laws, and more).

However, there are huge benefits to us enhancing our capacity and comfort with "no." Tapping into the power of "no" creates freedom, liberation, and a real sense of trust with the people in our lives. When we're someone that says "yes" when we mean it and "no" when we mean it - others know they can count on us to be real, tell the truth, and come through.

And, when we "no" with confidence, honesty, and compassion, we do one of the best things we can possibly do to honor and appreciate ourselves.

(For some specific tips and additional information, click on this link for this week's audio message.)

How do you feel about saying "no?"  What can you do to enhance your ability and capacity to say "no" with confidence and ease? Share your thoughts, action ideas, insights, and more on my blog here.

Stop Being So Hard on Yourself – Free Audio



If you're ready to get your "inner critic" off your back, you owe it to yourself to listen to the free 75-minute audio; Inner Mean Girl Reform School:  How to transform the critical voice in your head so you can stop being so hard on yourself, enjoy your life & feel truly successful.  This inspiring, compelling, soulful audio features my friends and colleagues Amy Ahlers and Christine Arylo, two of today's best inspirational teachers and master coaches, teaching transformational tools to get you out of your own way.  Sorry, guys - this one is only for women - but please share this with the women in your life whom you love - they will be so grateful!  Click here to grab the inspiring MP3 for free now!

Great New Book - Supercoach, by Michael Neill

Michael Neill has been a coach, advisor, friend, mentor, and creative sparkplug to celebrities, CEO's, royalty, and anyone who wants their life to feel less serious but more meaningful. Today, I'm pleased to share with you the launch of his new book, Supercoach: 10 Secrets to Transform Anyone's Life.  In this fun, easy-to-read book, you'll discover the secrets of transforming your life, and you'll also find dozens of exercises and "supercoaching tips" that will help you to have more of an impact on the lives of the people you care about most-your family, friends, colleagues, and clients.  For more info about this new book and to order copies of it today, click here.

Listen to My Radio Show - "Let’s Get Real"

As you probably know, I host a radio show called "Let’s Get Real with Mike Robbins" on Energy Talk Radio!  My show airs twice daily online at 7:00 AM ET and 5:00 PM PT (as well as each Friday at noon PT) via the live stream.  You can also listen to any of my previously aired shows on-demand, at any time by clicking here.  Feel free to listen live or on-demand, and let others know about it.  We've had some great guests on the show including Michael Beckwith, Marianne Williamson, Debbie Ford, and others.  I hope you're enjoying it!

"We're both pretty good at saying 'no' - Rosie's getting really good at it these days."
- Samantha and Annarose Robbins

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our mommy and daddy, click here.

For some new and very special photos of us, click here.